MyTipping Points

I have never been a particularly generous tipper. The whole concept of tipping annoys me - charge more and pay the staff better would be my preference. However, that's not the way it works.
Z recently said something which has stuck with me: if you can afford to eat a nice meal out, you can afford to leave a nice tip. Often servers are low income, especially in the kind of diners I frequent. And I remind myself: if I round up and am more generous, I am not going to miss it, but it may make a significant difference to the waitress. Of course I am quite measured in what I order, and that keeps the bill down anyway. Lately I've taken to ordering appetizers as entrees. The size of a typical entre is way too large for a middle-aged women who watches her weight. Ditto I never order dessert, and rarely order liquor. So I am not the ideal patron when it comes to the bottom line. But still, it's the principle. Cut back on the food ordered; go bigger with the tip.

Likewise my friend J taught me a lesson about tipping hotel maintenance staff gleaned from Nickle and Dimed , Barbara Ehrenreich's book on low-wage workers. If you want to help low-income women, who are likely immigrants supporting a family, leave a generous tip. Same idea: if you can afford to stay in a nice inn or hotel, you can afford to leave a generous tip. I have now adopted this as a spiritual practice.